ring ring.. i jump out of  the bed n take the phone..  oh i cant hear anything.. is  it she? is it? is it?

It’s frustrating to know that you can’t travel back in time. to go back and change things. It’s more frustrating to know that you can’t go ahead into future and see what’s lying ahead.
I wanted to see her badly, to talk to her, to hold her hands, but I can’t. sometimes I feel like going to her place and meet her but that would be just passing the agony and guilt that I’m feeling to a lot of other people too. Life after life? Rebirth? Or just death like animals? God? Brain? Soul? Life is just being confusing and miserable. All the books I’ve studied, all the visions I’ve perceived, everything I’ve assimilated seem waste. Simply waste.

I just wanted to cry out loud to someone. That’s why I thought I would bother you. No one to talk to. It was with priya that I used to share all my silly problems and all. I want to see priya, but would I ever again?? Priya, please come back.

I just wanted to calm down the fire Or it will burn out my heart.

Sept 09, 2002

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